A big ugly scary monster who sneaks up on you in the dark.
An enemy who throws you off balance…off kilter…just OFF.
One bad night of sleep and my heart is racing. I’m claustrophobic. I want to shut out the world. Just for a day…but still. Its so damn annoying that I have to worry about one bad night of sleep.
Just one, and I’m afraid of falling into a tunnel. I could if I’m not careful. If I don’t take care of me. If I don’t rest and recover. If I let the anxiety take over and squash me. If I listen to the lies that depression, anxiety, bipolar tell me.
Its so DUMB that one bad night of sleep–which is nothing to many people–hurts me so much. So DUMB that I don’t want to get out of bed. So DUMB that I don’t want to leave my house. So DUMB that my kids get stuck at home on a warm summer day because I don’t feel like me.
I hate it.
But I have to remind myself that its just one day. Its not all of me. Its not the whole summer, or my kids’ whole lives.
I won’t let the guilt consume me.
Repeat after me: PJ movie days are OK. PJ movie days are OK. PJ movie days are OK.
Its OK to eat chocolate.
Today is going to be a LONG day.
Does bad sleep affect you like it does me? What do you do to combat the effects? I’d love your thoughts.
PS. I promise I’m fine. Just had a bad night’s sleep and needed to vent. But I’m going to be OK.